Recommended Resources

The
Shelf.

Books, films, and websites I find myself recommending again and again. No affiliate links — just things I genuinely believe in, organized by the terrain they cover. Take what’s useful and leave the rest.

TRAUMA GRIEF BOUNDARIES INNER CHILD ACOA CODEPEND.

ACOA

1 resource
Book

Healing the Child Within: Discovery and Recovery for Adult Children of Dysfunctional Families

Dr. Charles Whitfield

ADHD

1 resource
Book

Scattered Minds

Gabor Mate, MD

Boundaries

1 resource
Book

Boundaries and Relationships

Dr. Charles Whitfield

Codependency

3 resources
Book

Boundaries and Relationships

Dr. Charles Whitfield
Book

Healing the Child Within: Discovery and Recovery for Adult Children of Dysfunctional Families

Dr. Charles Whitfield
Book

The Language of Letting Go

Melody Beattie

Grief

1 resource
Book

A Monster Calls

Patrick Ness
The story of a 13-year old boy trying to work through the big emotions that arise with the impending death of his mother. Book was adapted into a film.

Inner Child

5 resources
Book

Boundaries and Relationships

Dr. Charles Whitfield
Book

Children of Trauma: Rediscovering Your Discarded Self

Jane Middleton-Moz
Book

Healing the Child Within: Discovery and Recovery for Adult Children of Dysfunctional Families

Dr. Charles Whitfield
Book

Homecoming

John Bradshaw
Book

Recovery of Your Inner Child

Lucia Capacchione, Ph.D.

Intensive Therapy Programs

7 resources
Website

Begin Again Institute

Began Again Institute offers intensive therapy programs for men who seeking to further recovery from sex addiction. They also provide support for partners while their male partners are going through the program. Located in Longmont, CO.
Website

Bethesda Workshops

Located in Nashville, TN, offers Christian based intensive programs for men seeking to further their recovery for sex addiction.
Website

Krush Counseling

Jill Krush MS, LPC, TEP, CAS,CET3, EMDR II
Jill specializes in navigating codependency, depression, anxiety, stress management, trauma healing, and substance abuse issues. Located in Boulder, CO.
Website

Mountain View Farms

Aubrey Welch, LCMHC
Aubrey offers counseling for adults and children. Features incorporating of horses, dogs, cats, and nature into the work. located in Topsham, VT
Website

Onsite Workshops

Located in Cumberland Furnace, Tennessee. Offers group programs such as Healing Trauma Program, Living Centered Program and adventure programs such as Montana Equine Program. Also offers Individual, Couples, and Family intensives.
Website

Wholehearted Counseling

Jessica Hawbaker, LPC
Jessica works with adults and couples. Located in Birmingham, AL.

Marriage & Relationships

4 resources
Book

Boundaries and Relationships

Dr. Charles Whitfield
Book

How We Love: Discover Your Love Style, Enhance Your Marriage

Milan and Kay Yerkovich
Considers childhood attachment styles and childhood wounds and how such unresolved issues manifest in current primary relationship. Has workbook section to help untangle relationship messes and helpful script for engaging in meaningful conversation. Book is written from Christian perspective but is not overly religious.
Book

Scary Close: Dropping the Act and Finding True Intimacy

Donald Miller
Great book to learn more about emotionally intimate relationships.
Book

Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work 

John M. Gottman, Nan Silver
Simplifies relationship work.

Masculinity

5 resources
Book

Real Boys: Rescuing Our Sons from the Myths of Boyhood

William Pollack, Ph.D.
Book

The Rag and Bone Shop of the Heart, Poems for Men

Robert Bly, James Hillman, and Michael Meade
Book of poetry for men.
Book

The Sex Talk You Never Got

Sam Jolman
Written from a Christian worldview.
Book

Why Men Fake It: The Totally Unexpected Truth about Men and Sex

Abraham Morgentaler, MD
Book

Wild at Heart: Discovering the Secret of a Man’s Soul

John Eldredge
Classic text on masculinity. Written from Christian worldview.

Meditation & Reflection

6 resources
Book

Answers in the Heart: Daily Meditations For Men And Women Recovering From Sex Addiction

Hazelden Meditation Series
Daily meditation guide for men who are in recovery for sex addiction.
Book

Drawing on Gratitude

Jessica Hawbaker
A short, delightful guide to exploring gratitude through drawing.
Book

The Artist’s Way

Julia Cameron
Great resource for cultivating creativity.
Book

The Language of Letting Go

Melody Beattie
Book

The Self-Compassion Workbook for OCD

Kimberley Quinlan LMFT
Book

Touchstones: A Book Of Daily Meditations For Men

Daily meditations for men in recovery for sex addiction.

Memoir

3 resources
Book

Cat Daddy

Jackson Galaxy
Personal story of how Jackson got into addiction recovery as well as becoming at cat behavior expert.
Book

Naked in Public: A Memoir of Recovery From Sex Addiction and Other Temporary Insanities

Staci Sprout
Book

Sounds Like Me, My Life (so far) in Song

Sara Bareilles
Written by musician, Sara Bareilles. Chapter 4 is an amazing example of what self-compassion looks like. If you listen to the audio book that is read by the author, be sure to listen to the very end to hear the outtakes.

OCD

1 resource
Book

The Self-Compassion Workbook for OCD

Kimberley Quinlan LMFT

Parenting

4 resources
Book

A Monster Calls

Patrick Ness
The story of a 13-year old boy trying to work through the big emotions that arise with the impending death of his mother. Book was adapted into a film.
Book

Mother Hunger: How Adult Daughters Can Understand and Heal from Lost Nurturance, Protection, and Guidance

Kelly McDaniel
New edition coming out soon, Mother Hunger, Revised Edition: Understand and Heal the Wounds of Lost Nurturance, Protection, and Guidance, with new insights on men and Mother Hunger, first-born daughters, and parenting while recovering from it.
Book

Parenting from the Inside Out: How a Deeper Self-Understanding Can Help You Raise Children Who Thrive

Daniel Siegel and Mary Hartzell
Parenting from a neuroscience perspective.
Book

Trauma Through a Child’s Eyes: Awakening the Ordinary Miracle of Healing

Peter Levine and Maggie Kline

Pet Loss

4 resources
Book

My Cat Has Died: What do I do?

Wendy Van de Poll, MS, CEOL
Book

P.S. I Love You More Than Tuna

Sarah Chauncey (Author), Francis Tremblay (Illustrator)
Delightful, heartwarming book on grieving the loss of one's beloved cat.
Book

The Pet Loss Companion

Ken Dolan-Del Vecchio
Book

When Your Pet Dies

Alan Wolfelt

Poetry & Creative Writing

2 resources
Audiobook

The Poetry of Self Compassion 

David Whyte
Audio recording of a talk David Whyte gave on the topic of Self Compassion.
Book

The Rag and Bone Shop of the Heart, Poems for Men

Robert Bly, James Hillman, and Michael Meade
Book of poetry for men.

Self-Compassion & Shame

6 resources
Book

Daring Greatly

Brene Brown
Fantastic book about shame and emotional vulnerability.
Book

Healing the Shame That Binds You

John Bradshaw
Classic text on understanding shame.
Book

Rising Strong

Brene Brown
Book

Shame & Guilt: Masters of Disguise 

Jane Middleton-Moz
Book

Sounds Like Me, My Life (so far) in Song

Sara Bareilles
Written by musician, Sara Bareilles. Chapter 4 is an amazing example of what self-compassion looks like. If you listen to the audio book that is read by the author, be sure to listen to the very end to hear the outtakes.
Audiobook

The Poetry of Self Compassion 

David Whyte
Audio recording of a talk David Whyte gave on the topic of Self Compassion.

Sex, Porn, & Love Addiction

16 resources
Book

A Gentle Path Through the Twelve Steps: The Classic Guide for All People in the Process of Recovery

Dr. Patrick Carnes
Book

Answers in the Heart: Daily Meditations For Men And Women Recovering From Sex Addiction

Hazelden Meditation Series
Daily meditation guide for men who are in recovery for sex addiction.
Website

Bethesda Workshops

Located in Nashville, TN, offers Christian based intensive programs for men seeking to further their recovery for sex addiction.
Book

Cruise Control: Understanding Sex Addiction in Gay Men

Robert Weiss
Book

Disclosing Secrets: An Addict’s Guide for When, to Whom, and How Much to Reveal

Deborah Corley and Jennifer Schneider
Book

Erotic Intelligence: Igniting Hot, Healthy Sex While in Recovery from Sex Addiction

Alexandra Katehakis, MFT
Book

Facing the Shadow (workbook)

Dr. Patrick Carnes
Book

Healing the Wounds of Sexual Addiction

Mark Laaser
Written from Christian worldview.
Book

Naked in Public: A Memoir of Recovery From Sex Addiction and Other Temporary Insanities

Staci Sprout
Book

No Stones: Women Redeemed from Sexual Addiction

Marnie C. Ferree
Book

Out of the Shadows: Understanding Sexual Addiction

Dr. Patrick Carnes
Classic text on sex addiction.
Book

Recovery Zone, Volume 1- Making Changes that Last: The Internal Tasks

Dr. Patrick Carnes
Film

Thanks for Sharing

Lionsgate
An honest view of 12-step recovery for sex addiction. Film does contain nudity.
Book

The Porn Trap: The Essential Guide to Overcoming Problems Caused by Pornography

Wendy and Larry Maltz
Book

Touchstones: A Book Of Daily Meditations For Men

Daily meditations for men in recovery for sex addiction.

Sex, Porn, & Love Addiction: Betrayed Partners

4 resources
Book

Deceived: Facing Sexual Betrayal, Lies, and Secrets

Claudia Black
Book

Facing Heartbreak: Steps to Recovery for Partners of Sex Addicts (workbook)

Stephanie Carnes, Mari Lee, and Anthony Rodriguez
Book

Intimate Treason: Healing the Trauma for Partners Confronting Sex Addiction (workbook)

Claudia Black and Cara Tripoldi
Book

Mending a Shattered Heart: A Guide for Partners of Sex Addicts 

edited by Stephanie Carnes

Sexual Abuse Recovery

2 resources
Music

Make You

Lindsay Ell
Powerful song about healing from childhood sexual abuse.
Book

The Wounded Heart: Hope for Adult Victims of Childhood Sexual Abuse

Dan Allender
Written from Christian worldview.

Sexuality-Male

2 resources
Book

The Sex Talk You Never Got

Sam Jolman
Written from a Christian worldview.
Book

Why Men Fake It: The Totally Unexpected Truth about Men and Sex

Abraham Morgentaler, MD

Spirituality

1 resource
Book

Emotionally Healthy Spirituality

Peter Scazzero
Christian worldview.

Substance Abuse & Addiction

3 resources
Book

A Gentle Path Through the Twelve Steps: The Classic Guide for All People in the Process of Recovery

Dr. Patrick Carnes
Book

Cat Daddy

Jackson Galaxy
Personal story of how Jackson got into addiction recovery as well as becoming at cat behavior expert.
Book

In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts: Close Encounters with Addiction

Gabor Maté MD

Trauma & Healing

5 resources
Book

Children of Trauma: Rediscovering Your Discarded Self

Jane Middleton-Moz
Book

Homecoming

John Bradshaw
Book

Mother Hunger: How Adult Daughters Can Understand and Heal from Lost Nurturance, Protection, and Guidance

Kelly McDaniel
New edition coming out soon, Mother Hunger, Revised Edition: Understand and Heal the Wounds of Lost Nurturance, Protection, and Guidance, with new insights on men and Mother Hunger, first-born daughters, and parenting while recovering from it.
Book

The Body Keeps The Score

Dr. Bessel van der Kolk
A classic text on trauma and its effect on the body.
Book

Trauma Through a Child’s Eyes: Awakening the Ordinary Miracle of Healing

Peter Levine and Maggie Kline

General Mental Health

2 resources
Film

Inside Out

Disney/PIXAR
a creative look at the role of emotions in life

General Counseling Resources

4 resources
Website

Blue Harbor Counseling

Matthew Tiemeyer, LMHC
Matthew provides counseling for adults seeking help with disordered relationship with food, sexual abuse, and sex/porn addiction. Located in Edmonds, WA.
Website

Krush Counseling

Jill Krush MS, LPC, TEP, CAS,CET3, EMDR II
Jill specializes in navigating codependency, depression, anxiety, stress management, trauma healing, and substance abuse issues. Located in Boulder, CO.
Website

Mountain View Farms

Aubrey Welch, LCMHC
Aubrey offers counseling for adults and children. Features incorporating of horses, dogs, cats, and nature into the work. located in Topsham, VT
Website

Wholehearted Counseling

Jessica Hawbaker, LPC
Jessica works with adults and couples. Located in Birmingham, AL.

Cats

2 resources
Book

Cat Daddy

Jackson Galaxy
Personal story of how Jackson got into addiction recovery as well as becoming at cat behavior expert.
Book

Think Like a Cat: How to Raise a Well-Adjusted Cat–Not a Sour Puss

Pam Johnson-Bennett
Excellent resource for understanding cat behaviors and needs.